A Sad, Sad Norm…

Yesterday (Thursday, July 11, 2013) I was leaving work with two jackets in my hand, about to cross the street to meet my parents who were waiting for me down the road. I had just gotten them altered and picked them up from the tailor during my lunch time. They were in the plastic covering and this gave the appearance that they were new suits I suppose. One of my coworkers who was standing at the gate with two others, saw the jackets and asked if I just got a new suit for a wedding; MY wedding to be exact, with a big grin on his face. Mi look like mi ready fi married? :s
He’s a cool guy still; we don’t talk much, mostly ’cause he’s quiet, but we always hail each other and we have a decent working relationship. For some reason he was quite interested in this little faux development in my life. I told him no, I wasn’t going to a wedding, nor MY wedding (any time soon at least), and informed him I was merely bringing the jackets from the tailor. I went as far as to add that I couldn’t be getting married because “mi haffi find a ooman first!” with a laugh. Who tell mi fi guh seh dat? Rahtid!

About a month or so earlier, he saw me with a lady friend of mine in Half-Way-Tree, one to whom I even introduced him, y’know, seeing that I’m polite and all.

Bredrin! The man start laugh and ask how mi suh lie, ’cause him see me wid ooman a Half-Way-Tree. I couldn’t help but laugh too and assure him that the person he saw was only a good female friend of mine.

That’s when the bombshell dropped.

TOTALLY devoid or unconcerned of the two summer workers beside him (who happened to be girls), the man just blurted out, with grin fully intact:

“Suh, yuh start beat it yet?”
Uhh… What?
Yeah… that’s really what he asked. I’m still trying to figure out how two jackets in my hand led to that. Anywho, I could only offer an awkward smile and say no. I wanted to go as far as to let him know that that wasn’t a practice of mine, and I was planning to wait until marriage, but I think that would have caused even more of an outcry. Right away I took the moment as my cue to leave and informed him that I had to go, and I went across the street and into the safe haven of my parents’ car.
A dog doing as a dog does… Marking territory.

Now, I thought about it a little, and I was like “Wow. Is this really the society I live in?” Is this really how most of my contemporaries think these days, that the aim of talking to girls is just to have sex? Bwoy, I don’t know about you, but that’s a pretty sad reality to me. Here is a society, not isolated to only Jamaica, where it is expected that you’re just supposed to have sex–lots of it, with lots of girls–before you’re married, and that’s the norm.

(I would say at least is not just us in Jamaica, but what consolation is that really?)
Any girl you talk to, that’s the ultimate goal apparently; Get in. Hit it. Get out, and after that goal is attained, you move on very much like a dog would and continue to leave your pee (semen/pee–close enough) each place you visit, to mark the territory claimed/conquered.
Things like this make me ponder how much I don’t want to have daughters, just because of guys who live their whole lives with this mindset. Clearly they would have to make their own choices, and you could even argue that my sons could turn out like that, although I’d do my best to ensure that they don’t. What ever happened to Love, Marriage and then Sex? Is that process flow obsolete now?
Here is Jamaica, with most hitting out against gays only, but it’s apparently cool to have “nuff gyal” and ‘hundred stab’ di whole a dem. The thought may be okay to some, but for me? It’s a sad, sad norm.


4 thoughts on “A Sad, Sad Norm…

  1. Unfortunately, this is a society where normal is abnormal. It's like having a culture shock in your own country! I grew up a certain way and when you speak of you moral beliefs to some people they look at you as if you're growing two heads.

    God know why him seh wait until marriage. Now you see what happens when you don't. Some are born into dysfunctional families and people contract STDs.

    Well, the very few of us that are left struggling with the lusts of this world, God be with us.


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